WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE TODAY?

A RELATIONSHIP AGREEMENT WAS VIOLATED...

And now it feel like chaos has taken the reins of your emotions.

Tossing and turning through the night? Check.
Replaying conversations in your head? Yup.
Wondering if you’re actually good enough? Oh boy...

Perhaps you're the one who crossed boundaries. You’re desperate to repair the damage, but how? And in the meantime, the guilt is a crushing weight in your chest and every moment around your partner feels like walking on eggshells.

Or maybe you just found out you were unknowingly involved in someone else's deception. Now you're questioning everything you thought you knew. You’ve been played, you feel like an idiot, and who the hell will listen to your story without judging you for it?

YOUR PAIN IS REAL.

Trust takes time to build. Betrayal feels like taking a sledgehammer to it. And agreement violations create deep feelings of betrayal in many different ways, regardless of relationship structure and beyond just a physical affair:

In monogamous relationships:

Creating secret dating app profiles "just to look"
Sharing emotional intimacy that was supposed to be exclusive (having a "work spouse")
Engaging with OnlyFans, cam sites, or sexual content creators after agreeing not to
Financial support of another person (ex, child, family member) kept secret
Agreeing to plans with no intention of following through (like having children "someday")

In non-monogamous relationships:

Fluid-bonding with a new partner without discussion
Sharing intimate details about one partner with another when privacy was expected
Dating someone in a "off limits" category (ex-partner, friend, coworker, family member)
Using shared financial resources for other partners without discussion
Neglecting an existing partner during a New Relationship Energy period

This isn’t an exhaustive list, but the common thread is that when relationship agreements are violated it shatters trust and leaves you wondering if repair is possible.

WHAT COULD HEALING LOOK LIKE?

Whether you are partnered and trying to rebuild your relationship together, or you're working through this individually, agreement violations affect people from all walks of life and all types of relationships.

If you're the one who was betrayed: Your pain is real, regardless of your relationship structure. You’re not a failure. You deserve support that understands the deep impact of betrayal without judgment about your relationship choices, and helps you in deciding what to do next.

If you're the one who violated agreements: You can recognise the impact of your actions and take responsibility for them, without being consumed by guilt and shame, and develop integrity and healthier coping strategies. You can become the partner (and person) you want to be.

If you were unknowingly involved: You're not responsible for someone else's deception. You’re not a fool. It’s not your fault. Being manipulated into unknowingly violating someone else's relationship agreements doesn't make you complicit in their actions. You can learn to let go of self blame and all the “could have/should have”.

SO WHEN WE WORK TOGETHER

You may discover:

Ways of communicating about difficult topics without constantly fighting
How to create agreements that actually work for you (not just what you think you "should" do)
Steps for rebuilding trust in ways authentic to you and your relationship
Or that you deserve something different, and that's okay too

And instead of spending months digging into what went wrong, we'll focus on what you want your life and relationship to look like moving forward. I use approaches that help you:

Separate yourself from the problem so guilt & shame doesn't overwhelm your ability to heal
Identify your existing strengths rather than focusing on what's broken
Create sustainable agreements that align with your actual values
Author the next chapter of your story, whether that's together or apart

We are not ignoring that a betrayal has happened. We will explore its effects on you and your relationship, examine the stories that contribute to its impact, and with that understanding clarify the future you want and discover the resources you have to make it a reality.

READY?

Your healing matters. Your relationship, with your partner or with yourself, deserves compassion and support. And you don't have to figure this out alone; I'm here to help you find a path forward.

Contact me for a brief consultation. We’ll talk about what you're experiencing and how I might be able to support you. There will be no judgement or pressure to continue past that. Take it as an opportunity to see if we're a good fit for this important work.