My Blog

Walking into a couples counselling room for the first time can feel daunting. It is a bit strange, frankly, to sit down and spill your relationship issues to a stranger. So if you’re feeling a bit sceptical about the whole thing, that’s completely fair. Let’s take the mystery out of it, then. I’ll walk you through exactly what the process looks like when you work with me. It doesn't actually start with the first session; it starts with the consultation call. Key Takeaways A 3

You’ve been sitting with this for a while, haven’t you? Whether it started as a passing "what if" or a deep dive into polyamory reels, the thought has stuck . Now comes the dilemma: you haven’t told your partner yet . You’ve done the dress rehearsals, but the stakes feel enormous. Frankly, who wouldn’t put that off? But the longer you sit with it, the bigger it gets. Let’s talk about how to actually have the conversation. Key Takeaways The "Why" Matters: "I don't know, it j

If you’ve been trying to figure out whether you want polyamory or an open relationship, you’ve likely noticed how much energy goes into getting the label right. There is a common trap of thinking that if you just pick the correct term, everything else will magically fall into place. The distinction matters, but probably not in the way you think. This is about understanding the difference, and about figuring out what you actually want instead of getting stuck debating termin

Key Takeaways Being "open-minded" is just the baseline: It doesn't replace the actual knowledge required to navigate metamour dynamics or relationship hierarchy. Non-monogamy is not a problem: A specialist takes your relationship structure as a given; they don't treat it as a symptom or the primary problem to be solved. Context over educating: You should spend the session processing the issues that have brought you here, not educating the counsellor on what solo poly or a

Key Takeaways: For those navigating masculinity, feeling useful isn't just about ticking off domestic to-do’s; it’s a core way to feel safe and connected in a relationship. Masculinity is often about performing that everything is okay, and this can mask the exhaustion and fear of not being/doing enough underneath. Trusting a partner to exist as a separate individual doesn't drive them away. It makes staying a daily, active choice, increasing intimacy & commitment. Let’s look

It’s 2021. A crisp, late afternoon in the middle of August. We’re having a decent summer. There are people and their pets strolling through the park. And there I am, sitting on the grass in the shade, listening to the ring ring of a suicide helpline. Hold on. Wait. How did I get here? A man about to hit 30, with a world of expectation he placed on his own shoulders, and no idea how to make any of it a reality. I followed the path of education laid out before me and left unive

The first time I sought personal therapy, I went onto Counselling Directory and started scrolling. I wasn’t too sure what I should be looking for. A friendly face? Tons of qualifications? At some point, I sighed, logged off and thought ‘look, you’ve gotta work this out yourself’. Except all the trying in the world was getting me nowhere - if anything, I was digging myself a deeper, darker hole. Questions & platitudes that held me back from making a decision. What would I e

If you're non-monogamous and thinking about getting some support, there's a decent chance something’s been quietly putting you off. Maybe things aren't bad enough to justify it. Perhaps you're not sure what kind of help you actually need. Or you're simply tired of explaining yourself. You've had the raised eyebrows from people who don't get it, and the thought of sitting down to spend a whole session doing the "okay so I'm not cheating, this is consensual, let me explain w