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Key Takeaways: For those navigating masculinity, feeling useful isn't just about ticking off domestic to-do’s; it’s a core way to feel safe and connected in a relationship. Masculinity is often about performing that everything is okay, and this can mask the exhaustion and fear of not being/doing enough underneath. Trusting a partner to exist as a separate individual doesn't drive them away. It makes staying a daily, active choice, increasing intimacy & commitment. Let’s look

It’s 2021. A crisp, late afternoon in the middle of August. We’re having a decent summer. There are people and their pets strolling through the park. And there I am, sitting on the grass in the shade, listening to the ring ring of a suicide helpline. Hold on. Wait. How did I get here? A man about to hit 30, with a world of expectation he placed on his own shoulders, and no idea how to make any of it a reality. I followed the path of education laid out before me and left unive

The first time I sought personal therapy, I went onto Counselling Directory and started scrolling. I wasn’t too sure what I should be looking for. A friendly face? Tons of qualifications? At some point, I sighed, logged off and thought ‘look, you’ve gotta work this out yourself’. Except all the trying in the world was getting me nowhere - if anything, I was digging myself a deeper, darker hole. Questions & platitudes that held me back from making a decision. What would I e

Maybe your partner pursued a connection in a way that went beyond what you'd discussed, and you only found out because something didn't add up. Maybe a safer sex agreement was quietly abandoned. Perhaps date nights that were supposed to be protected keep getting cancelled in favour of a newer connection. Or someone made a decision that affected the whole network without consulting anyone else. However it's happened, there's a moment where the shock of what you've just discove

Here's the thing about non-monogamy: you’re gonna talk about a lot of things that most people in relationships never have to think about. How much time you give to different connections. Which details get shared between partners and what is kept private. What happens if someone catches feelings when that wasn’t part of the plan. These aren't conversations monogamous couples typically have, but when you're non-monogamous navigating them is part of the deal. And yet, even p

If you're non-monogamous and thinking about getting some support, there's a decent chance something’s been quietly putting you off. Maybe things aren't bad enough to justify it. Perhaps you're not sure what kind of help you actually need. Or you're simply tired of explaining yourself. You've had the raised eyebrows from people who don't get it, and the thought of sitting down to spend a whole session doing the "okay so I'm not cheating, this is consensual, let me explain w